Uncle VBmernon,G Uncle VBmernonG
IndepBmendent as a hGog on iF#ce
He's a bBmig-shot dGown there at the slaBmughterhouseG
Plays accBmordion for MGistF#er WeBmiss
Uncle BEmiltmoreC and Uncle WiEmlliamC
Made a mEmillion during WCorld War BII
But they're tEmightwadCs and they're chEmeapskatesC
And they'll nEmever give a dCime tBo yEmou
Auntie Mame has gone insane
She lives in the doorway of an old hotel
And the radio is playing opera
All she ever says is go to Hell
Uncle Violet flew as pilot
And there ain't no pretty girls in France
Now he runs a tiny little bookie joint
They say he never keeps it in his pants
Uncle Bill will never leave a will
And the tumour is as big as an egg
Has a mistress, she's Puerto Rican
And I heard she has a wooden leg
Uncle Phil can't live without his pills
He has emphysema and he's almost blind
And we must find out where the money is
Get it now before he loses his mind
Uncle Vernon, Uncle Vernon
Independent as a hog on ice
He's a big-shot down there at the slaughterhouse
He plays accordion for Mr. Weiss
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